How to design a brilliantly awesome fantastic website
Today with modern computers and graphics design packages anyone can create a brilliantly awesome fantastic website. Get the insider tips here that those fat cats in the design business don't want you to know about! Here today we have the top eight tips that will make your website stand out from the crowd.
Are you as smart as this monkey? If you are then you too could design a brilliantly awesome fantastic website.
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(1) Pages
People hate having to click through multiple pages so the number one design rule is to put everything on one page. True they may get RSI having to scroll through it but at least all of the information is at their fingertips.
(2) Plugins
The wonderful thing about technology is that it's constantly evolving. Be sure to have the latest plugins and use them everywhere on your site. Just imagine the tears of joy rolling down your readers faces after they spend twenty minutes downloading a plugin so they can see your logo rotate in 3D. Is there anything more satisfying I ask you?
(3) Mood
Setting the right mood is important so don't forget to have some background music playing on your website. If you match it properly to the sites content then it will be a thing of artistic beauty. If you don't have any songs that are right then just go looking through the BitTorrent sites. Once you have downloaded it be sure to send a link to the artist as they will be overjoyed to hear that you are using their song.
(4) Graphics
Don't be stingy on the graphics. A lot of people will recommend using JPEG compression but that will impact on the quality of your pictures. In the modern age of high speed internet access there really is no reason why you shouldn't be using the BMP format. Sure it may be ten times as big but your readers deserve the very best uncompressed full quality pictures.
(5) Flashing
No we don't mean walking around wearing nothing but a raincoat scaring people. What we are talking about is Flash animation. Animate your logo, your introduction screen, your buttons even the background. You can even highlight important parts of your site by having the Flash animation flash. This is known as flashing the Flash. Note, if you use a lot of flashing Flashes then a health warning may be necessary in case any of your visitors suffer from epilepsy (also known as flash intolerance).
(6) Links
The beauty of the internet is that you can link to anything. See a photo you like or a link to an application? Copy that link and add it to your web page. You will be surprised how much space you can save by leeching off other sites.
(7) Advertising
After all the effort of designing your website you should be making some money off it. That's where advertising comes into play. The most effective type is the popup kind which you need to close before you can read the article. However some users will try to get something for nothing and will just close the popups without reading them. But we have a cunning plan. Just embed advertising to the left, right, above and below the article. Also embedding it in the article works too and is a sneaky way of getting your readers attention. One minute they are reading about 18th century poetry the next they are being persuaded to buy Viagra. So how much advertising should you have? I suggest the 20/30/40 rule. 20% of the page should be text advertising, 30% graphics based and 40% Flash animation based. The rest can be devoted to the article.
(8) Content
A lot of people will say that content is king when it comes to designing websites. I say what do they know? If you follow the seven tips above the content is almost irrelevant. The mental age of most web surfers is eight anyway, so for content just have a picture of a dancing rabbit.
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